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introduction to nealumphred.com

THE ORIGINAL SUBTITLE FOR NEAL UMPHRED DOT COM was “ratiocinations out of thin air – observations recollections recommendations.” It still is, except that this lovely theme that I am using (Readit Pro by Modern Themes), doesn’t allow for me to use it at the top of the homepage in a manner that I like, so it’s a missing! So then I am retitling my introduction (this post) after my old subtitle . . . Ratiocination is the “process of reasoning,” or to think thinks through logically, non-emotionally. It appears to have originated in the early 16th century from Latin ratiocinationem… Continue Reading introduction to nealumphred.com

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tales from the crypt of the rightwingnut blogosphere (where is susan berman?)

YOU KNOW THOSE “NEWS STORIES” that pop up all over the internet one day and you can’t avoid them? You know, the ones that read, “Hillary to be indicted for fribbing on the jimjam on her private server and lying about it!” You see them all over Facebook and they seem so goshdarn important and faster than you can say “Susan Berman” they’re gone! In fact, there are so many of these non-story stories on the rightwingnut blogosphere that they’re impossible to keep track of! Last month I read an article titled “Woman Shows Off Anti-Trump Poster While Doing Job. Problem… Continue Reading tales from the crypt of the rightwingnut blogosphere (where is susan berman?)

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tales from the crypt of the rightwingnut blogosphere

YOU KNOW THOSE “NEWS STORIES” that pop up all over the internet one day and you can’t avoid them? You know, the ones that read, “Hillary to be indicted for fribbing on the jimjam on her private server and lying about it!” You see them all over Facebook and it seems so goshdarn important and then—bazinga!—just like that, they’re gone! In fact, there are so many of these non-story stories on the rightwingnut blogosphere that they are all but impossible to keep track of! Last month I read an article titled “Woman Shows Off Anti-Trump Poster While Doing Job.… Continue Reading tales from the crypt of the rightwingnut blogosphere

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is “voter fraud” a new political buzzword in the rightwing blogosphere?

WELCOME TO SIDE 4! Follow in your book and repeat after me as we learn three new terms in Turkish: ‘buzzword,’ ‘voter fraud,’ and ‘viral news story.’ Excellent! Now, before we go any further in the book, I have here a bit of background on two topics: voter-fraud and popular American political buzz-words. Then we will stroll through a day in the life of a viral ‘news story’ (the quote marks should tell you that they’re not really stories with factual news) as it wends its way through the rightwingnut blogosphere and finds its way into the welcoming embrace of FoxNews and… Continue Reading is “voter fraud” a new political buzzword in the rightwing blogosphere?

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we can talk about it now or any ol’ time you want

NOW WE CAN TALK ANYTIME! You and me! (You and I?) (Us?) I added a live chat line to my websites; the access icon is a picture of me; it can be found in the lower right corner below. When I am online, just click on it, type a message, and I can respond! We can then have a back-and-forth talk about whatever is on your mind. Beware: because of the nature of the medium, lengthy statements are almost impossible to make. We’re stuck with short bursts back and forth. And that’s the nexus of this article; from here on in… Continue Reading we can talk about it now or any ol’ time you want

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a fishing expedition with a nasty dude in camelot

BEING A CREATURE OF HABIT (well, sort of) (um, not that often, really, but occasionally), I turn first to tried and true Merriam-Webster when looking up definitions for new (and sometimes old) words and phrases. It’s still one of the best online dictionary resources, even if I do find more appropriate definitions for my needs in other dictionaries. Such is the case here regarding the term “a fishing expedition.” And I trust we all know what a nasty dude is. Using Merriam-Webster, I found a legalese definition of a fishing expedition as “an inquiry as by the use of… Continue Reading a fishing expedition with a nasty dude in camelot

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the astounding creatures of masayoshi matsumoto

“A rock pile ceases to be a rock pile the moment a single man contemplates it, bearing within him the image of a cathedral.” Starfish. Centipede. Jellyfish. Bee. Lizard. Butterfly. Scorpion fish. Caterpillar. Hermit crab. Flamingo. Phoenix. Beetle larvae. Octopus. M asayoshi uses balloons only! Masayoshi Matsumoto has taken care to keep a very low profile: he is 25-years old and a recent graduate of Tokyo Institute of Technology, where he studied 有機高分子物質 (organic polymer materials). I did find what appears to be his website: Isopresso. There he claims, “バルーンで色々なものを作っています。このページに掲載している作品は全て風船のみからできています。シール・ペン・接着剤などは一切使用していません” (“I make many things with balloons. The images that are posted on this page are made only… Continue Reading the astounding creatures of masayoshi matsumoto

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replacing graffiti’s calligraphic howls with helvetican readableness

I CHOOSE SPONTANEITY! Spontaneity over the prepared. Usually. I like the playful kineticism and calligraphic howls of free-hand, spray-canned, torpedos-be-damned graffiti at least holds attempts to achieve. I would choose that over predictably tame, looks lame machine-generated typography. But sloppy is not spontaneous, and most graffiti is not art, it’s just ugly—often an eyesore replacing an eyesore. The article “Guy Paints Over Shit Graffiti And Makes It Legible” from the Design You Trust website introduces us to Matthieu Tremblin, an anti-graffiti graffiti artist. Matthieu wanders around France, finding ghastly graffiti everywhere. And if we recall Sturgeon’s Principle (it ain’t no law!) that “90%… Continue Reading replacing graffiti’s calligraphic howls with helvetican readableness

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sometimes ‘alias’ ain’t no alias at all

I LOGGED INTO MY KCLS ACCOUNT and in the Search field typed “alias.” I wanted to place a hold on the fourth and fifth seasons of the ABC television series Alias from earlier in this century, starring Jennifer Garner. Aside from the five DVDs for the series and perhaps a few books about the show, I wasn’t expecting a large amount of entries under that word. Hah! There were more than 250 entries for ‘alias.’ But before I continue, first there is Alias the series. Berni and I are Jennifer Garner fans—we’ve actually seen Butter (twice!) and rave about it to… Continue Reading sometimes ‘alias’ ain’t no alias at all

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philando’s first law of resistance

FIRESIGN THEATRE’S FIRST FOUR ALBUMS make up a small body of work that stand as some sort of achievement in recording. They combined various forms of humor (from the lamest puns and sophomoric in-jokes to the subtlest of witticisms and allusions that take many, many listenings to appreciate) with political, social, and cultural satire. Along the way, they created several gems that have use outside of their alternative reality, such as Fudd’s First Law of Opposition. But the albums were equally remarkable as technological achievements: the alternative reality in which each took place was created by production and engineering… Continue Reading philando’s first law of resistance

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think on the craziness of that!

ELVIS DIED WITH ONLY 28 GOLD RECORDS. That is, he collected only twenty-eight official RIAA Gold Record Awards during his career. Neither he nor Colonel Parker nor RCA Victor showed any real enthusiasm for the awards while he was alive. Since his death, the Presley People have done an admirable job in getting RCA and the RIAA to make things right. Working with the vast personal files of Colonel Parker, the RIAA certified and awarded 110 Gold and Platinum Record Awards to the Presley estate in 1992. Since then, another eighty-eight Awards have been added to the list. There… Continue Reading think on the craziness of that!